The question, to me at least, truly is as simple as the headline above frames it.
Growing up as a kid in the 1970s, there were a great many things I wasnât allowed to do yet, but I was told I would be permitted to do once I was old enough to make my own decisions in life. Things like smoking cigarettes, drinking booze, driving cars and yes â shudder â looking at pornographic images.
In most areas of life, the promise I was given as a kid has held up. I donât happen to smoke, but I could do so, even knowing itâs terrible for me. I do drink occasionally, although ironically enough, a lot less often now that Iâm allowed to do so than I did when I was a teenager doing something forbidden by the law.
And yes, Iâm still allowed to look at porn. But as I look around the world and contemplate the circumstances in which many other adults currently find themselves, I canât help but think they live in countries where the government is functioning like parents who canât face having their kids move out of the house and become fully formed adults.
Earlier this month, it was reported that in the United Kingdom, âonline pornography showing strangulation or suffocation is to be made illegal, as part of government plans to tackle violence against women and girls,â as the BBC put it.
Donât get me wrong; Iâm no fan of choking in porn. In fact, seeing it actively makes me cringe and recoil from the screen. (Iâm not too fond of people spitting on each other, either, but thatâs a whole other kettle of saliva.)
I also understand that choking someone to the point they almost pass out isnât good for that person or her/his brain. Thatâs another reason why people arguably shouldnât engage in âbreath playâ during sex (or at any other time, for that matter) â but itâs still not a reason for the government to ban it in porn.
Consider this: Itâs illegal to do a lot of what we see inside the cage during an Ultimate Fighting Championship match if it takes place outside such a competition. If you get into a bar fight with someone, put them in armbar and break their freaking arm, youâre likely to be prosecuted for aggravated assault. Do the same thing inside the octagon and youâre the winner!
Is it good for kids to watch people break each otherâs arms? Probably not. But do you know what sort of depictions arenât age-restricted in a way that would lead to a criminal (or civil) penalty for those broadcasting the event, or any adult who allows a kid to watch it? You guessed it â mixed martial arts (MMA) fights.
MMA also doesnât prevent the adults who participate in it from choking each other unconscious, breaking each otherâs limbs, giving each other concussions, or otherwise doing grievous bodily harm to each other.
Why isnât choking in MMA illegal in the UK, but choking in a porn context is about to become so? My guess is it has a lot to do with paternalism and eons-old double standards regarding men and women.
If a man chokes out another man in a competitive context, or a woman does so to another woman, well, thatâs just sport, right? If a man chokes a woman to the edge of consciousness in a pornographic context, well obviously thereâs an imbalance of power and heâs abusing her â even if sheâs lying there demanding âchoke me, choke me!â
(That said, itâs not like the UK choking depiction ban will have an exception for choking in scenes pairing women, so maybe itâs as simple as âsport good, sex bad.â)
You also probably wonât see calls in the UK for depictions of choking in a fictional context to be banned. Game of Thrones fans may recall Stannis Baratheon seizing the Red Woman by the throat and choking her after her perceived failures in helping him seize the Iron Throne; I donât expect weâll hear calls for that scene to be deleted from UK-facing platforms, in part because both characters have their clothes on throughout this evidently harmless bit of violence against women.
We also likely wonât hear many people complaining that the NFL games played annually in the UK are too violent, too filled with concussions, or somehow unsuitable for viewing by children. After all, they want to sell out those stadiums and create future generations of fans to come support American football. The NFLâs money talks and the typical, paternalistic logic about âprotecting childrenâ walks right out the door.
I could go on and on, because the examples are nearly endless. Everywhere you look, sexually explicit depictions are subjected to restrictions that other forms of expression and entertainment simply are not, but that sure seem as though they should be restricted, if the same reasoning is applied.
Again, donât get me wrong: I donât want any of the things Iâve listed above to be banned, or even more strictly regulated. I just want consistency in allowing adults to be adults, permitting us to take informed risks and go about our lives with minimal government intrusion into our lives â and I donât want consistency to come in the form of comprehensive prohibition on the whole lot.
After all, if we try to restrict people to doing only whatâs safe and not âbad for them,â do you know what none of us should be doing? Driving to fucking work.
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